Dear Miss Manners: I refuse to accept plastic items at gatherings, and do without if there is not another option. Finger foods on a paper napkin work very well, as gatherings that use plastic tend to be casual. I take paper goods as my contribution, so others have a choice, also.
This is done without getting on a soapbox or offending the host. This planet is drowning in plastic, and each person can make a difference, starting with their personal choices. If one can refuse to eat meat, one should also be able to refuse, tactfully, plastic.
Well, yes, but here on the ground (as opposed to up on the soapbox), the way to do that is not to draw attention to why — or what — one is refusing. Just as Miss Manners objects to the guest who explains in detail why she hates mushrooms, she believes that a guest with a preference for paper should confine her answer to a polite, enigmatic refusal.
Dear Miss Manners: We all know that cutting in a line is rude. At grocery stores and banks, polite people are used to lining up nicely. Why then, when we are driving, do some people insist on cutting?
I’m referring to those times when a construction zone is ahead, and we are supposed to move into one lane. Most cars do, but a few will use the still-available free lane to zoom ahead and scoot in front of the polite (gullible?) drivers. As a result, the rest of us end up going even slower.
I have tried something that my husband claims is dangerous. Perhaps it is. But is it also rude?
There are only two lanes going in my direction. I see ahead a long line in one lane, and know that all traffic in the other lane will eventually have to merge. So I move into the free lane. But instead of zipping ahead, I stay slow, moving at the same speed as the rest of the traffic.
I’m not cutting, but I am keeping others from cutting in front of me. When I get to the very front, I then signal to merge in. I may have to wait a car or two, but I’m only back those few cars, instead of the many that would have cut.
Do I merely risk being shot at by an angry and rude driver, or am I also being impolite?
We all laugh dismissively when a character in a play or movie makes the most minimal change in appearance — glasses, a hat or a cape — and is no longer recognized by the other characters in the drama. But the joke is on us.
A driver can be seen and recognized. Miss Manners says this not to justify rude behavior on the road, but to agree with you how bizarre it is when otherwise polite and sweet-tempered individuals believe they can get away unidentified.
The underlying tenets of manners do not change on the highway, which means that while she agrees that it is rude to cut in line, it is also rude to provoke other drivers. While you could claim that your solution does not do that, we both know what is in your heart.
New Miss Manners columns are posted Monday through Saturday on washingtonpost.com/advice. You can send questions to Miss Manners at her website, missmanners.com. You can also follow her @RealMissManners.
2020, by Judith Martin
Read Again https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/advice/miss-manners-saving-the-planet-one-plastic-fork-refusal-at-a-time/2020/03/18/466865b8-5a8d-11ea-ab68-101ecfec2532_story.htmlBagikan Berita Ini
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